Neil Yan Dot Com

I can’t swim! I’ve tried to learn in the past, but to no avail. The instructors in my university swimming class felt pity on me and just gave me my first red cross badge, just to make me feel good, but I didn’t deserve it. I couldn’t swim the 25 metre length. I’ll admit it; my cranium is too large. When I look over my shoulder to take a breathe, I’m still under water…not completely, but enough that I’d take a “gulp” of water if I tried. That sucks! Mainly because I love the water! But, if you put diving fins on me, I’d be able to swim. Does that mean I have small feet?

So Ben doesn’t inherits his dad’s inability to navigate through H2O, we have registered Ben in swimming classes every Sunday for the next 9 weeks. The community centre by my house in Markham offers a Parent & Tots class, every Sunday morning from 10-10:30AM. It’s an introduction for infants 3+ months into the water. Class One: A SUCCESS. The only time Ben cried was when his dad accidentally dunked his mouth AND NOSE passed the wavy pool, ultimately Ben taking a big gulp of chlorinated pool water. He didn’t like that. But with a big hug and some comforting, he was back in the dolphin shaped life-saver enjoying the ride.

I’m pretty sure Ben will be swimming circles around his dad before he turns 4. Maybe I should consider another kick at the can and register for adult classes. Maybe this time I won’t wear see-through shorts

There are pics on the photo link above of Ben first pool experience.

Sheila and I made a bet a while back to see who Ben would call first, “mommy” or “daddy”? I officially lost. Although at his ripe young age of 2.5 months, Ben has started with what sounds like “mmmaaaaammmmaaa” just as the crying starts. I have conceded defeat. I’ve tried to wish it meant something else, but as soon as I hand him to his mother, the crying stops. “Mama it is”!

Studies show that a baby cannot communicate verbally until after 18 months. But what they can learn is sign language! We received a book who teaches sign language to infants a while back. Sheila’s sister-in-law has taught both her daughters (3 and 2 years old) how to sign, and it’s amazing to see the younger one sign “milk” when she’s hungry!! So, to get a jump start on it, we have started to teach Ben the basics: milk, poo, pee and change. It’s all out repeating the signs before each action. I don’t think he gets it yet, but hopefully within a few months, he’ll start letting us know what he wants without crying.

If you want more info, there’s a small section of books at Chapters in the Newborn rack about signing for infants. I’ve picked up one for a friend who recently had a baby girl. Maybe Ben and Jaime can sign each other when they get older! The ironic part is that they won’t be able to change or feed each other.

Here’s a link to baby stages of comprehension.

Here’s a link to a site with basic sign language signs for infants.

I posted in my last blog what I thought was a cute video of Ben amused with the sights and sounds of his mobile. But what I shortly learned from a few women in my place of employment, it’s not about Ben! It’s about the surroundings! First, someone pointed out that I had no bedsheet on the mattress!! What?!! I didn’t even see that as I’m filming. Then Sheila pointed out that Ben is lying down on one of the receiving blankets that we “borrowed” from the hospital (don’t worry, I’ll return it someday). So I had to ask, “Did anyone see the child or the mobile in the video?”.

Then it struck me, WOMEN are more detail oriented than men! There was a study conducted a few years ago where female and male students watched a 15 minute “romantic” video and were asked a few questions after it. The results: 1) the females remembered what was hanging behind the door that the man came through, 2) the kiss was passionate, 3) the clothes they wore before they disrobed. The men’s results: 1) couldn’t remember the hair color of the actors 2) the kiss was only foreplay and 3) the video was pseudo soft-porn. The main idea behind the study was to prove that women are more detailed oriented and that the sexes viewed movies differently. What the females perceived as a romantic love making scene, the men took as porn! Now there’s a surprise!

So, I found this profound video on YouTube; I find it kind of funny, but be warned, “All women will find this offensive!” I love our Arab cousins and their way of thinking! Enjoy.

Alright. You’re thinking there can’t be any more interesting stories about Ben’s shitting and peeing episodes. Besides, he’s only 2 months olds and 14+ lbs! How much excitement can there be in his life? Like in past blogs, he’s life is centered around his basic needs: food, sleep, excrement and visual stimulation (the last one is recently new). But that’s it! Right? NOPE!

We recently discovered ELIMINATION COMMUNICATION. It sounds like a mouth full, but basically, it’s potty training for infants. “What? Potty training at this young stage?”, you say. You bet! I’ve wondered in the past how parents in other nations, particularly in third world countries where disposable diapers are a luxury, how they handle baby “elimination” (ie. the poo and pee). They don’t have the luxury of walking across the street to Shoppers, plop down $14.99 (on sale) for 72 Stage 2 (12-18lbs) disposable diapers. Also, I’ll assume most don’t dispose of them in a Diaper Genie II either. So, how do they do it? Well, as it seems, they use whatever works! Old clothes torn into strips to keep that “stuff” contained. Cloth reusable diapers is the norm in these countries. So, it’s imperative that these kids are potty “trained” early to lessen the chore of hand washing diapers…down at the river.

So, there’s this (I call it) underground movement (well, maybe not so underground now with the Internet), to potty train infants as early as 2 months old! Most start at 6 months, but they say the earlier you start, the better the success. Most have reduced their diaper dependence significantly. On average, in the first 24 months, a baby can use between 5000-7000 diapers (we on track to use that amount)! That’s crazy! In Toronto, diapers are not compostable; they go straight to landfill. You can image how much trash that takes if you have several thousand kids using diapers. In Markham (York Region), diapers can be composted; the gels and non degradable products in the diaper are separated and shipped to landfills. Environmentally, disposable diapers are horrible.

So, the premise behind EC is that you look for cues to time your child’s elimination. Sheila has been fantastic at reading Ben! She’s got it pretty much down to a science; he’s got different faces or sounds for when he needs feeding to when he’s crapping. EC’s success is based around timing these cues and repetitive signaling. We got a hand-me-down potty seat from a friend. We sat Ben down the other day and we basically talked to him to “poo”. Two minutes later, he peed! But wait, a few more minutes later, HE CRAPPED!! We had success on the first try!! On the first day, Sheila got him to his potty chair twice, he did it both times on cue! We’re trying to associate the word “POO” with the seat! It might be voodoo or crazy parenting!! But guess what, in the 3 days we’ve tried, Ben has crapped and pee at least twice a day in it. That translate into 2 less diapers we needed to change. The diaper he had on was still dry! If we keep this up, we’ll reduce his “diaper-print” on the planet by 20%. That’s a significant savings on the wallet too!!

So, to the skeptics, he still needs diapers. At night and throughout the day. It’s a lot more work on us (mainly Sheila), but in the end, I think we can get Ben out of diapers a lot sooner. Worst case, we reduce the number we throw out to landfill; either way, we’re ahead!

Here’s a link to more information about EC.

..and goes head to head with Jim Cramer of Mad Money. The feud between these two have been brewing for about a week now. It’s no wonder, George “W” is out of office, so he needed new material. Although it probably started out as a joke, turned into what they dubbed “Brawl Street”

Here’s the link to the face-off:

http://watch.thecomedynetwork.ca/the-daily-show-with-jon-stewart/full-episodes/march-12-2009/

It was reunion night for Ben tonite. Our Saturday Prenatal class from last December had a get together to meet all the new parents and new babies. Of the 12 couples that took the class, 7 couples showed up (plus one couple from the Tuesday class). It was pretty interesting to see that we all pretty much are going through the same things (feeling, traumas, challenges and elation).

What’s not surprising was Ben was the 2nd heaviest child in the group. Only one other child, who was 2 weeks older, was heavier; he was 15lbs (given he was also born at just over 9 lbs). The weight range was from 10lbs to 15lbs, with all kids born within 3 weeks of each other. Two of the kids were not only big, but long also. Ben was in the middle. He wasn’t the shortest! What was surprising was the 3 Asian babies in the group had the most hair. One was bald,  but most of the white kids had minimal hair. Suffice to say, all the kids were cute…even the least cute one.

I’ve posted some pics on the photo link. Enjoy.

We grew up not worrying about anything. You put food in a plastic container, then put the container in the microwave, heat the food and then proceed to chow down! Those were the good old days. Nowadays, you’re told not to microwave food in plastic containers. So when we received a new feeding bottle for Ben we had to do some research. The plastic bag that will contain the milk has a #4 recycling symbol on it. Is it safe? It’s plastic!! How can it be safe? Won’t some of these chemicals leach? What does the number mean?

A quick google search shows that these number represents which chemicals in the plastics are recyclable. Not all recycling facilities in your region can recycle all plastics. You have to check with your municipality to see what they recycle; even if you toss it into the recycle bin, they end up sorting it out and giving it a field trip to Michigan (where our city garbage goes).

What’s scary is that we still need to use these chemicals in the production of our plastics. Most of it is for cosmetic reasons; so that we can have clear plastics. Does LDPE sound safe? It’s stands for Low-Density PolyEthylene. That’s #4! And yes, it’s suppose to be safe. HDPE, the high density version, you bet, also safe. HDPE is #2. #3-Polyvinyl Chloride..NOT so safe (it’s also known as PVC). I guess if it ends in “lene”, it’s safe. Not sure why. But now I know: 2+4=5 is how I’ll remember which plastics are safe!

Here’s a link to a more complete list.

One of the biggest things I prepared myself for was the incessant crying of an infant. I’ve learned that they “mainly” (and I use the word loosely) cry when they’re a) hungry b) dirty or c) tired. When Ben cries, we go through the checklist to see which one stops his glass-shattering pitch. Usually it’s hunger, which sort of explains his weight gain. Any little “urk” from him, and he’s immediately on the boob! It seems to work for him, and we love it because he’s quiet! Sheila and I can’t complain, Ben’s a really good kid. He’s limited his crying to only a few minutes at a time and only a few times a day; and rarely at night now (or at least I’m too tired to notice anymore)!

So, I’ve noticed less crying from Ben BUT MORE CRYING FROM MEN!! Yes, MEN! On TV!! Over the past few weeks, I’ve noticed a significant number of adult men crying on television. It has nothing to do with a kick in the groin, or a movie, or anything to do with sports. These “men” on some of these “reality” TV shows are sooo fricken emotional! Here’s who I’ve seen cry on TV lately:

1) The dude on The Bachelor! Yes, I watch it! Have you not seen some of the girls on the show? But anyways, the dude fricken cries EVERY WEEK!! No wonder he can’t hold on to a chick! He’s a sissy! His son’s a bigger man than him, and he’s only 3 years old. That’s right, the DAD CRIES MORE THAN THE CHILD! Frick!! Grow some balls, dude!!

2) The asian guy on the Amazing Race!! He’s all confident and cocky one show (because they came first on the second leg of the race), and then crying like a little girl in the next episode. It had something to do with his lack of poor judgement and his little whiney sister’s bid to win his respect. Come on, man! Stop treating your sister like a fifth grader (ones who are probably smarter than him) and learn to listen! And yes, GROW SOME BALLS!! The dude broke down in the middle of the race and sobbed like a little girl! That could have cost them the race.

3) And then there’s J.D “mis” Fortune! Remember him? The dude who won the lead role to sing with INXS a few years ago? Ya, they went on tour for a year and that was it! One “tour” wonder. He’s done nothing with the group ever since. ET interviewed him last week, and the dude BROKE DOWN!! He started sobbing about the relationship he had with his now “EX” band members. Supposedly they didn’t really have a problem with him and they were actually going to contact him to start recording. Now that he’s gone public with his dismay with the band, they decided to sever all contacts with him. What a loser!! Maybe he has a reason to cry, but dude…NOT ON NATIONAL TELEVISION!

I’m pretty sure there’s a lot more crying that I haven’t seen. I know the economy is rough on everyone, but c’mon!!

The cool part of all this, when I make notice of this stuff, Ben shows a little smirk on his face. He’s thinking the same thing as his dad, “those sissies”!

Here’s some bio’s to some of these “men”:  JD misFortune, The Bachlor Dude, and Asian Dude on the Amazing Race

Every now and then, more often then none, I look at Ben and I’m amazed how far he’s grown in such a short time. It’s week 7 and he’s already over 12 pounds; I’m even going to guess that he’s over 13 pounds now. So, I decided to do some investigation online and there’s a whopping number of studies and growth charts! Of course all of them come with the disclaimer that YOUR CHILD IS UNIQUE and he/she might not follow this chart with respect to growth.

So, the problem now is who’s chart to agree with? Pampers has a chart on their site. They should know something about babies; it’s what they do! Then there’s the WHO (no, not the Guess Who)…the World Health Organization, a UN directed organization. They should know something about babies too. They’ve been monitoring it for decades around the world. The only problem I have is they’ve lumped in stats from developing countries with all countries. I’m going to assume that would bring down the weight curve, or at least widen the weight band. That, and the chart is in Kilograms! That’s the show stopper.

But, after looking at a few charts, they all show one thing in common. The growth curve is similar. There’s a steep growth spurt in the first few months, then the slope gradually tapers off after 14 months. By “eye-ing” some of these charts, Ben is on schedule! His weight is normal! What a relief! Worst case, we want a “bigger” baby now so that he can fight the “elements” vs a small baby who might have more difficulties.

Here’s a link to the Pamper’s chart and the WHO chart!